I thought I would have some fun with an old Christmas classic. Often (if we are lucky) we can escape the shackles of our daily routine and let our imagination freely roam. One of my favorite exercises is to change up words to songs on the radio, TV dialogue…etc. In fact, much of what I absorb on any given day is reprocessed through filter A’la MST3k where words are replaced and sentences take on new meaning. Anyway, I hope you enjoy. This is a wordplay mashup of “A Visit from St. Nicholas”, also known as “The Night Before Christmas” replaced with references to Dungeons and Dragons
Twas the night before Christmas, after a long night of game
A Dungeon Master dreams of his next D&D campaign
And in that dream lay the land of Faerun
Where the power of Szass Tam manifested through wicked rune
A new party sprang from tomes, guides and handbook pages
The D&D Classics – Fighters, Clerics, Rogues and Mages
The Dungeon Master in Robes and his players in leathers
They set off for adventure in the wicked Sword Coast weather
With a penchant for trope the party set priority first
And off to the tavern they did head to quench thirst
When just then, from high above arose such a scream
They sprang to the shadows praying it was just a bad dream
They risked a peek from their dark hiding place
And confirmed their fears, their hearts they did race
For high in the sky piercing clouds and breathing fire
A great red dragon did soar, their plight was dire
Then without warning whilst they quaked most manic,
A party of heroes appeared, showing no panic
The Ranger was first to take aim at the beast,
The Cleric quickly blessed him before he released
Now in flight, the arrow soared straight and true
The Bard broke into song as the Ranger’s missile flew
Her voice was strong, mocking and vicious
She sang to conjure damage most malicious
But victory over the dragon the heroes would not easily earn
And in the dragons volcanic fire, the arrow did burn
The barbarian and fighter stood with weapons slack
Knowing the reach of their steel did lack
Dutifully, they took positions. Weapons they did draw
And when time came, they would strike without flaw
The Rogue was the next hero to have a try
They watched as he scaled a tall building, but why?
Then it struck them, the plan he was cooking
He would wait for right time, when the beast wasn’t looking
And when the great dragon flew under the Rogue’s perch
He leapt onto its back, burying his dagger – making the beast lurch
With a great shake the wyrm dived, turned and wound
He shook the Rogue loose, sending him falling to the ground
Quick afoot the Monk sprang into action
And broke the Rogue’s fall with a quick bonus action
The Paladin stepped forward in devoted commitment
The Warlock at his side…dark, foreboding and full of bewitchment
Calling upon a god, and conjuring a power of old
The unlikely allies magic did unfold
The hand of Helm smote the dragon at long last
While the power of the ancients slammed into it with an Eldritch Blast
A warm breeze settled over the scene
As a Druid appeared on the village green
With twigs in hair, he stood gazing at the beast most frightening
He paused, then thought “It would be best to call lightning”
The Druids brow furrowed in determined concentration
And in short order everyone realized his magnificent creation
A storm cloud formed quickly, its objective in sight
And suddenly, with a thunderous clap it did strike
For an instant the dragon stopped dead in flight
Electricity coursing about its body, it was an ominous sight
Not to be outdone and seeing his chance
The Sorcerer joined in on the murderous dance
He bent his mind toward the dragon telepathic
And upon getting a read, knew best how to wreak havoc
With a pinch of sugar, some grain and some fat
The Sorcerer unleashed a plague of insects, “Take that you old Bat”
The Wizard, old and frail, sat on stump watching intently
His time would come, and it would come not incidentally
Seeing the wyrm now distracted and distraught
He looked to his spellbook finding the page he earlier sought
Standing, he approached the beast uttering words of ill will
“What spell is this” you ask? “Why of course…its Power Word Kill!”
